Making this blog happen is not being an easy task. I didn’t forget about it. I just don’t have time to do it. And, to be honest, even when I can have little break, I usually don’t have the will to do it.
I find myself thinking and rehearsing in my mind what I’ll write next, but when I’m in front of the computer my eyes wander aimlessly at the screen, scrolling up and down my Facebook feed. And when I realise, I have to rush again, sooth a baby, make dinner, have a shower. Yes, because even looking after myself sometimes feels like a chore.
So I downloaded the WordPress app (which I’m using right now). The plan was to write posts or at least drafts from my phone when Henry is napping or playing by himself (two if the rarest events in the universe). It’s being months since the app is in my phone. It’s been used once.
The thing is… writing, to me, is a very big deal. English is not my first language and I have never had a formal lesson apart from some classes when I was in primary school. So it just doesn’t come easy. Talking is easier, reading is second nature, but writing requires thought. Lately even speaking became less fluid because I’ve been speaking Portuguese with Henry and my brain is a bit tired.
Then there’s choosing a subject.  I’ve done loads I  the last year, but my crochet and knitting deserve photos and my parenting and motherhood mental drafts always end up so negative, with a lot of complaining and whining that even  I get fed up (see, I’m aware of it). But maybe I should write them anyway. I’ve got photos of my crafts, they could be posted later (more likely never, but hey, at least it’s a start!) And maybe offloading the frustration and tiredness would help them go away.
I know it just takes a few minutes to write a blog post. The quality may be questionable but at least I would keep the blog going and, more importantly, I would keep myself going. For the time being I’ll do what I can.  


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